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Is it just me or is there just something about that warm whether that rejuvenates every positive aspect of your life?

As the sun begins to shine again, and the rays hit my body, I feel a new life being thrown into me.  Every year I encounter this same fantastic rejuvenation of mind and spirit.

Suddenly work doesn’t seem so bad anymore.  The hours don’t seem so long.  And I really don’t mind all that much doing little errands, cleaning my house, or writing blogs as I sit typing outside for the first time in months!

And what better time to take advantage of these great feelings than by riding the emotional highs through our dating life.  If there is ever a better time to date, where people are in better moods, and opportunity is fully available, spring and summer is the time.

Take advantage of this time of year.  Odds are your date will be in a great state of mind for an online pick up!

The other day I received an email from someone asking me for some online dating advice on a profile.   Unfortunately I was not able to help fix it due to contractual obligations with partners of mine.

However, when I offered some of the services that my company provides, the person was quick to insist that the help was not really necessary and that she just needed to take a break.  She went on to claim that she has a great profile and has spent tons of time perfecting this aspect of her dating life.

Before going any further, it wasn’t a money thing.  When we got into deep conversation, all the self defense mechanisms came out through her writing and she clearly wanted to believe she needed no help.

Without sounding too mean and judgmental, the messages that were written, although extremely courteous and nice,  were full of things that would completely turn almost any guy off.  In addition, she asked for help with her profile theninsisted it was actually really good because she had worked so hard on it. She then went on to change her mind saying she just needed a break because she has spent years online dating.

This is what I call a classic case of denial.  This girl was nice, and had plenty of potential to find an amazing guy.  But she clearly needed help, then wrote off the need for this help when it came crunch time to accepting that help.

We all need a little help sometimes. We are too blind to our own faults.  It is only human nature to protect our own self esteem.   Heck, I was online dating for years before I figured things out.  My advice to anyone struggling out there is to never live in denial.  Get the help you need rather than wasting month after month with no success and tons of frustration.

My hope to this day is that this woman does eventually get the help she was originally looking for, because she was truly a sweet girl.

In my last entry I discussed the reason behind most online rejections.  In many cases, pending that you have worked on your online dating skills and learned how to thoroughly generate interest and attraction, being “rejected” often has nothing to do with you.  It is more due to the competition and overwhelming amount of emails that these women are receiving on a daily basis.

But what happens when the lack of responses mounts and the cold streak builds higher and higher.

At times like these you must do one of two things.

a) Push through the lows.  Even the best of the best have times where they are not at the height of their game.  Call it bad luck, call it the low of averages, but sometimes when it rains it pours and vice versa.

b)  Perhaps more importantly, be self-reflective.  Most guys on the Internet suffer from an inflated sense of confidence in which they never realize they are doing anything wrong.  They insist that everyone else is the cause of their failures and that they are just unlucky, online dating is terrible, and women are just mean.  This is a bunch of non sense, and as a former struggling online dater, I once made similar excuses.  A long dry spell often means that you need to work on flaws in your game and develop your skills with women more.

Never be afraid to learn.  It is what separates those who are great in life from those who settle for mediocrity.  Push through those lows and come out of them on top!

Facing rejection through online dating has to be one of the worst feelings in the world.  Especially that dreaded Instant Messaging rejection as you sit there and see the words, “Susie874 has declined to answer your Instant Message at this time.”

Believe me, I know the feeling.  As a former struggling online dater I saw that familiar sentence on 100hookup more times than I would have ever liked to.  Being rejected feels bad enough, but being rejected without ever even having a chance to make your pitch is an even worse feeling.  At least when we get rejected in real life we have a chance to say something or be heard out!

While these feelings can be crippling to your self esteem, the truth is, its not your fault.  Don’t take it personally.  These women are not necessarily rejecting you for reasons that have to do with your looks or personality.  It is more that they get bombarded by more messages than they could ever answer.

I often say, “hall of famers bat 300″ online.  There is so much competition that even the best will often be “rejected” seven out of 10 times.  The important thing is to follow online dating tips that will provide you with the best possible chance to bat .300.   So work on every aspect of your online game that you could think of, and when you are in tip top shape, if that dreaded “decline” comes, have no worries because its probably nothing personal; here are plenty of women around the corner.

Make no mistake about it.  Online dating is one of the greatest gifts a single male walking this earth has ever been giving. 

In the past men, were so dependent upon external factors in order to find themself in a successful relationship.   They either had to get lucky by meeting someone in their daily life, have people set them up, or go out looking endlessy at bars, nightclubs, etc. for a date.

Times have changed.  Unfortuntely, there remains one myth and that is that finding a relationship will be easier online than in real life.  The truth is, while the opportunity is much greater, since we can attempt meeting women any time of day, any time of week, the effort still has to be put forth.  Especially if you are a male.

This is mainly because there is a lot of competition out there for the top quality girls.  You will have to do things that make you stand out and push you way beyond the competition, to get you noticed, and proceed to build attraction.

Sound difficult?   It’s much easier than you may think.   As long as you put the work in, though, and learn how to be successful at online dating, finding a relationship will happen.  And when it does, the hard work will be worth it!

In my last blog entry I discussed the importance of creating a great online dating profile if you are a male.  While writing these may not be fun, it is extremely important to women and can make or break you.

But this raises the question:  What exactly makes an online dating profile high quality?  There are a number of things that you can do to make yourself stand out from the crowd.

1.  Learn the art of strong language use.  Try to write things that make you appear to be a strong, confident male, and avoid weak lanuage and clingy sounding statements that so many males accidentally use.

2.  Incorperate methods that build on attraction.  Branching off the first suggestion, not only dowe want to appear strong and confident, but we want to implement qualities such as demand, value, mystery, etc. that increase attraction levels in females.

3.  Show a little humor.  Most profiles say the same thing over and over and over and over and… Okay you get the idea.  Show a little humor, especially witty, funny humor.

4.  Be conversational.  Engage the reader through your writing.

These are just a few tips I usually write about to get you started.  Good luck!

Millions of men that sign up for online dating spend almost all of their energy trying to find the perfect pictures, and trying to write women the perfect messages.  Don’t get me wrong, these things are tremendously important.  However, while it is great to make your messages and profile pictures as intriguing as possible, many males completely neglect the importance of writing a great profile.

The truth is, it’s easy to understand why men would overlook this.  It isn’t exactly fun for most men out there to sit down and try to create the perfect profile.  Unfortunately, life isn’t always fun, and creating a profile that builds on many different levels of attraction and interest is extremely important.  Especially for men.

Why?  Because the female thought process tends to work as follows:

First a women looks at your message.  If she is intrigued she will move on to your profile pictures.  If your profile passes the test she will then move on to you your written profile.

Your written profile is the final point at which she will make her decision.  Create one the right way and you will succeed.  Fail to deliver and you may just find yourself striking out. 

Bottom line: always take the time to create a great online dating profile, while using all the most effective profile building techniques  possible.  It is critical to success.

Today I was listening to the radio and an interesting question was proposed.  Does the statement, “once a cheater, always a cheater” always hold true, or can someone truly change if they find the right person?

Ask 10,000 people this question and you will probably be able to divide a line right down the middle with some heated fighting in between.

There are many men who claim to have been cheaters in the past, but become reformed once they finally are ready to settle down.

But this begs the question: How does anyone truly know that these “reformed” cheaters stopped cheating? 

Many women will say, my boyfriend was a cheater, but he stopped with me.  Is a cheater actually going to come out and admit he is cheating?  No way!

But then again, perhaps there is a difference between a serial cheater and somebody who has cheated once or twice.  This could all depend on the context and given situation for each individual cheater.

Regardless, this leaves the question:  Would you want to ask your online date if he or she ever cheated in the past?  The answer just mayforever open Pandora’s Box and leave you with a cloud of doubt that you aren’t prepared to handle!

Writing about online dating for a living often requires me to answer a lot of questions that people really don’t want the answers to.  Especially women.

The other day a female friend of mine came to me with questions in regards to whether or not someone she just met online is the type of guy she should stay away from. 

She informed me that she had a great time. However, he said a few things that were somewhat unsettling to her.

She wanted to know if it was bad that the sexual suggestions came rather quickly, that he claimed to have been a player in the past, and that she just wasn’t sure if he was really reformed or not.

When all was said and done, she had a good time and wanted to see the guy again.  The truth is, your instincts are usually right.  Even if you have a great time with a guy or girl, if the red flags are there, it is best to break away from the relationship before things graduate to the next level.

Most times things don’t change.  And once feelings are developed, it is all that much harder to leave the relationship even if your bad instincts were proven correct.

Bottom line: Trust your instincts.  They are usually there for a reason.

Scenario:  You are out and about and decide it’s that time of night to hit on a female.  You approach her feeling good and ready to kick some game.  The opener goes well, you’re having a great conversation and then, out of nowhere, the woman says she has to go.  You are left confused wondering where things went wrong.

This can be an extremely frustrating aspect of picking up women online.  With the hundreds of things that may have occurred during the course of one conversation, it is nearly impossible to pinpoint specifically where things went wrong.

Enter online dating.

 One of the most beautiful aspects of online dating is that you have the ability to go back and save a conversation.  Every single step of your pick up is right in front of you, all typed out.

 This is an amazing gift, allowing you to study every aspect of your pick up and figure out where exactly things went wrong.  It enables you to improve upon your mistakes, fix the kinks in your game, and be more prepared than ever for your next online pick up.

Copy and pasting is your best friend.  Save your conversations and use them to your advantage.