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May 26

Disappearing Guy

by GemsFromJen under JBloggers,Online Dating

Dear Gems from Jen,
I met a guy online and we started chatting online, then progressed to talking over the phone. Things were going well, at least I thought, then he just vanished….have no idea what went on….
 
Why dont guys just tell you they are not interested rather than disappearing?

- Disappearing Guy
  
Dear Disappearing Guy,
 
I don’t think your question is unique to say the least. This happens not just to women, but to men too. 
 
I have actually asked people why they would just vanish rather than saying something to the person they are trying to leave. Most people respond with something along these lines: I don’t want to hurt her/him.
 
When I hear that answer, it truly makes my skin crawl. My belief is that people vanish because they are cowardly and would rather not deal with any potential conflict that could arise from communicating openly and honestly.  Anyone who just vanishes without an explanation is running from their imaginary fears.
 
Do yourself a favor and remember this is not about you not being desirable, but rather, it is about this guy not being comfortable with who he is.
 
Signed,
 
Gems from Jen

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