Last week, I talked about some general dating fashion tips, but this week, let’s get specific. How do you know what kind of date calls for what kind outfit? Check out the list below for some guidance:

Coffee date: Asking someone for coffee means “you’re a decent online conversationalist, and I’m ready to meet you in person, but I’m not willing to commit to anything involving time or money in case we don’t click in real life.” Due to the casual and brief nature of the coffee date, you’re allowed to look casual. However, because of the brief encounter, your first impression is even more important here. This means that you should take care to look good and presentable, even if you’re wearing casual clothes. Do not wear gym clothes, leggings, or anything that shows you clearly stopped by the date on the way from an activity that involves sweating.  A sundress, jeans, or a sweater dress and boots in the winter is perfect.

Drinks and/or dinner: I put drinks and dinner in the same category, because, if a drink date goes well, it will often lead to dinner.  Assuming this dinner date doesn’t involve a drive-thru window, look extra nice!  Ladies, this means a dress and heels (unless your date is shorter than you, in which case, use your discretion), or something equally dressy. Guys, slacks and a shirt always work – and tuck it in and use a belt!

An “activity” date: This can include bowling, hiking, rock climbing, or any extreme adventure from The Bachelor that doesn’t actually happen in real life.  You will be moving around, so you want to be comfortable (i.e., not pulling up your strapless bra or tugging at your dress), but this is NOT an excuse to wear some ratty old gym clothes.  ‘Athleisure’ is a thing for a reason.  Leggings (in good condition) plus a bright colored top and tennis shoes will do for the ladies.  Guys, clean clothes without holes and tennis shoes in good condition are acceptable. You might decide to go to a casual restaurant afterward, so make sure your outfit is versatile.

Wild card: In this scenario, all you know is that you’re getting picked up at 8. You aren’t sure where you are going or what you’ll be doing.  Unfortunately, you must be prepared for a multitude of situations.  You should be safe wearing something on a level between your coffee date and dinner date.  Wear semi-comfortable shoes in case you end up walking more than expected, and for either gender, you can’t go wrong with nice jeans and a cool jacket.

Ladies, when it comes to dressing for a date, men want to see you look your best, but we also want you to be dressed appropriately for whatever activity we’ve got planned for you. Case in point, wearing heels to a park isn’t going to make for a great walk. You get the point.

Many women ask me what types of outfits men find appropriate but sexy, and where the line is drawn between sexy and “easy.” Here are some tips to help you get dressed for your big night out (or in).

1. The Coffee Date
Most coffee dates are going to take place in the daytime, so leave the cocktail dresses at home and go light on the makeup. If it’s during the day (and in the warmer months), showing a little leg won’t hurt. Also, hats could be a bonus if you have something that suits you well, i.e. fedora, beanie, etc. Cute summer dresses, or even your hottest work outfit, will do.

2. The Dinner Date
If we’re taking you out to dinner, we’re serious about wanting to get to know you. Wear something that shows off your best features, but nothing that makes it hard for us to hold eye contact. Dinner dates (or night dates) are the perfect time to dress up and bust out those sexy stilettos. Most guys won’t even know what stilettos are, but we do know that you will be looking elegant.

3. The Activity Date
Depending on the activity, there will be a good chance things could get active. This doesn’t mean you need to break out the workout clothes or Lululemon pants. Instead, throw on some leggings in case you need to be limber, and some flats so your footwear doesn’t limit you. In this case, comfort should be accounted for so your attention will be spent on us, and not a wardrobe malfunction.

4. The Surprise Date
These are hardest dates to dress for, because chances are you have no idea what the guy has planned for you. He’s trying to be romantic and mysterious, so he tells you to be ready for anything. By anything, assume it’s going to require you looking your best. A dress, leggings, or skinny jeans will all do as long you’re dressing to impress. This is a good time to go with something sexy over comfortable.

If you haven’t gotten the hint yet, then I’ll just tell you plain and simple: men are visual creatures. We get excited when we see a hint of skin or the silhouette of your body. But, we also want to be able to bring you home to Mom and/or Bubby — so always keep it tasteful.

Read more from Tripp here.