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Sep 30

Blogging at Services

by JeremySpoke under Judaism

I decided to put off writing this post until after Rosh Hashanah services. I, however, did not at all know that my mom and step-dad decided to go to the late services, and it wouldn’t end until 10:30. As fatigue began to set in a good five minutes into the opening prayer, I was holding on to the hope that the new rabbi was not as boring as stereotypes of rabbis tend to be. So far, I couldn’t tell because everything he was saying was in Hebrew. He knows this is a reform congregation, right? At least I hope he does. We don’t understand languages that aren’t English and written to music by Debbie Friedman.

Ten minutes in, and I suddenly realized that I was going to have to write this post after services were over. That was not an option. I was going to get some sleep, and I didn’t care if modern Judaica had to be realigned in order to fulfill this need for me. There was only one solution: write my post on my cell phone in the middle of services. Sounded sin-tastic to me. Wait, sins don’t exist in Judaism, do they? Excellent.

As I reached into my pocket for my phone, I suddenly heard it ringing. This was not good at all. No, hold on. No, it was coming from somebody sitting behind me with the same ring tone. Though I was in the clear, this led to an epiphany. Maybe this was god telling me to not use my cell phone during services. Maybe he (she?) has embodied this new rabbi, and wanted me to listen. Hey, he mentioned Bill Murray in his sermon. This guy gets me. He’s like one of us, and has a killer robe too.

So, I waited, and I’m writing my post here in my room way after services ended. If you are a hookup woman and are attending services at Congregation Emanu El in Houston, TX tomorrow morning, I will be there! Please initiate conversation because I’m not so good at that.

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