To Get What You Want, Make a List
under Online Dating,Relationships,Single LifeI love lists. They’re so handy! When it comes to dating, I have 4 lists I refer to, which are grouped under the heading: “What I Want in Another Human Being.” No need to be hetero-normative, right?
These 4 lists include various traits pertaining to human characteristics I like and dislike in other humans. The 4 lists are:
- Musts
- Wants
- Deal Breakers
- Price of Admission
If someone is missing a Must, I can’t accept a date with him in good conscience. He’s missing something I consider fundamental.
If someone is missing a number of Wants, I may still accept a date, but he is already high on my red flag watch.
A Deal Breaker is just that. I don’t bother wasting my time when it’s clear someone possesses one or more of these traits.
The least obvious is the Price of Admission category. To discover these, you most likely will have to accept a date or two. They are personality quirks or lifestyle behaviors that you aren’t hugely attracted to, but that you’re willing to put up with on a case-by-case basis. Basically, if someone is awesome but has a random drawback that kind of rubs you the wrong way, you need to decide if it’s a Deal Breaker or a Price of Admission. If you think a movie looks like a winner, you pay the Price of Admission, right? If you think it doesn’t look so great, you may pass or wait until you can stream it for free.
How do you categorize your priorities? Mine are listed in an excel sheet. Go figure. Analytical Haley strikes again!