Archive for the ‘Date Night’ Category

In general, jealousy is an ugly trait. When you recognize jealousy within yourself, it typically is an indication of your own insecurities. Unfortunately most people don’t make that connection… which is why jealousy is generally unhealthy.

But, every so often, jealousy can be healthy. Healthy jealousy is that feeling you get when you didn’t notice how hot your date looks (and didn’t give them a compliment either), but catch others checking them out with admiration. At first you may get pissy and feel that others are disrespecting you by checking out your date right in front of you — that’s the jealousy. But then you realize that your date is hot and they deserve to know you think so — that’s the healthy part.

Sometimes it takes that little bit of that green-eyed monster to help you appreciate what you have sitting right in front of you.

Over the weekend a woman had to be rescued from a chimney after stalking a man she met online and went on just a couple dates with. Now she’s trending on Facebook and making national news.

This is not the 15 minutes of fame that you want. Do not become this girl. There is internet-stalking (checking out your prospects on social media and Google)… and then there is scary-stalking where you end up in jail after firefighters have to use liquid dish soap to hoist you out of a chimney. This is not a fine line or a gray area, this is an obvious no no, this is straight up crazy.

When you’re interested in someone — whether it’s a new prospect on 100hookup or after a first date or after a few months — making plans is the way to let them know you’re still interested!

People can carry on conversations with lots of prospects online, but it’s only you’ve made plans that you know this one is different. And then after the first date, having plans made immediately for a second date is how you know that there’s enough mutual interest to continue getting to know each other. And once you’ve been dating for awhile, then making plans is assumed.

Whenever a plan isn’t made — regardless of the scenario — is when people begin feeling insecure about where the relationship (or the possibility of one) is going. So if you like someone, make plans to see them again, otherwise you’re just playing games.

When it comes to matters of the heart,  every person will have a different viewpoint. People like to spew all sorts of cliches:

• “I knew he was ‘The One’ the moment I laid eyes on him, and you should get that feeling too”
• “Love is blind and doesn’t see color, religion, or money”
• “Love is easy, and if it’s too hard, then it’s not true love”

Just because one couple had a successful relationship after falling in love at first sight, or being a different race and believing in a different G-D, or never fighting, doesn’t mean that’s how it should be for you. In fact, those couples are the exception — not the rule. When it comes to matters of the heart, there’s only one cliche that counts: follow your heart.

Do you remember that episode of Friends when Chandler complains about Rachel’s boss’s eye gunk? You know, the mascara that gathers in the corners of women’s eyes after a long day? Many men complain to me how much it grosses them out. That, and the raccoon eyes women get from their eyeliner and mascara in the pool or shower. Unfortunately this is another thing that women have to think about when they’re dating.

What about that white stuff that gathers in the corners of your lips when you have cotton mouth? Ew! Or the boogers that you can’t figure out how to get rid of without digging for gold? Ew! How about those razor bumps or zits that seem to appear out of nowhere? There is so much to have to deal with when you’re dating because you don’t want your prospect to see you looking less than perfect — or even worse, being grossed out by something and getting the Ick Factor! Ironically, this is often the stuff you stop caring about as soon as you’re in a committed, long-term relationship!

I’ve discussed this topic before, but now Reddit readers have come together to make a list of what singles should never wear on a date unless they want to stay single.

The list is pretty thorough, but many suggestions on Reddit didn’t make the final cut… but deserved to! They include such gems like:

• Floor-length jean skirts
• A court-mandated ankle bracelet (duh!)
• Platform flip-flops
• T-shirts with stupid sayings, or cartoons, or giveaways from sporting events (especially when tucked into slacks or light blue jeans with tennis shoes)
• Saggy pants
• And crocs

Do any of these describe your wardrobe?

I believe in any excuse to commit to bettering yourself — whether it be January 1st or the hookup New Year, the start of the school year or your birthday — find any excuse to start being a better you now.

The High Holy Days are a great time to do so since you get the opportunity to repent and redeem yourself. When you’re reading the alphabet of sins, and are able to unfortunately connect with a few of them (admit it, it’s way more than just a few!), then make a promise to yourself to be better starting now.

Stop judging prospects based on their bad photos or typos, stop speaking badly about others and gossiping about your dates or others in the community, stop lying and deceiving others whether in your profile or in person. And of course there are so many more ways to become a better person, don’t wait for December 31st… start now!

Here are some great lists, articles, and videos for singles to read/watch while hiding out in the bathroom during a break from High Holy Day services:

23 Reasons People Actually Ended a Relationship

71 Reasons We We’re All Still F*cking Single

If Women Were Honest on First Dates

10 Things Happy Couples Do Differently

Weird Things All Couples Fight About

Best wishes for a happy and healthy New Year, and I hope this year leads each of you to a better you… and possibly even to your beshert!

I first mentioned the show Married at First Sight back in July when it premiered on the fyi, network. After 5 weeks the couples had to decide to stay together or divorce. Then this past week they caught up with the three couples five months later (six months after the met) to see where they were, how they were doing, and what they thought after watching the show air.

Of the three couples, two decided to stay together and are still together to this day. The third had a difficult time getting along from the start and chose to divorce. They were the oldest couple, they were the only couple to consummate their marriage before their wedding night, and they were the only couple not to get a new residence, choosing instead to move into the wife’s existing apartment. None of these were necessarily the reasons they split up, of course, but it is worth mentioning the differences between them and the other couples.

There were a few items that stood out to me about the only couple who failed in this social experiment: as the oldest couple they were each more independent and set in their ways than the other couples; although they had great physical chemistry, they acted on it before establishing any trust or even a friendship; they had a difficult time communicating and each became very defensive when being criticized; and finally, they wanted vastly different types of relationships: he desired more stereotypical gender roles — while she did not. This is a fundamental difference of opinion — a clear incompatibility — and a topic that needs to be discussed on one of the first few dates.

#TheSinglesProject, Bravo! TV’s revolutionary show about singles dating in real-time with input from the Twitterverse, has become must-see TV.

The eligible bachelor and bachelorettes run the gamut of different “types” in the dating world right now. We have seen them date their status quo and then allow others — friends, family, and Twitter — weigh in on who they should date next. Most times the set-up fails miserably, but it is nonetheless interesting to observe who others think is right for each person. The best part about the show is seeing how the singles — Tabasum, Lee, Ericka, Joey, Brian, and Kerry — see themselves on TV and read about themselves on Twitter… and then make changes to how they each think and act.

If nothing else, the show has provided a unique microscope for which singles to examine their lives and make adjustments accordingly. Would you go on a show like this?