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Sep 1

Dating Tips From Five-Year-Olds

by JeremySpoke under Relationships,Single Life

As I have already mentioned, I recently started my first job in the education field. I am lucky enough to be in a class of three to five-year-olds. I soon learned that that is the perfect age group to teach. They are old enough to know how to walk and talk and are young enough to not know anything at all. They have no inhibitions. They don’t care what comes out of their mouths. They don’t understand concepts like ‘friendship’ and ‘anger’. Again, they don’t know anything.

Spending an entire day with a group of these people is akin to a bad acid trip. It’s like suddenly learning that an entire race of people, whom you thought didn’t exist, actually existed. They don’t care about anything. They cause all of my insecurities to surface. They constantly ask why I sweat so much. One child asked how I got so hairy. I told him that I got it from my dad. He responded by asking if my dad is a werewolf. That conversation actually took place. Yesterday. Afternoon.

If these children have taught me anything, and they haven’t, it’s that I shouldn’t be ashamed or embarrassed about anything ever. My insecurities on dates would pretty much disappear after a full week with these children. I bet about eighty 80 percent of my dates nowadays are spent worried about why I sweat so much. After a half hour with these kids, the only thing I will be thinking of on dates from now on is how happy I am that I’m on a date and not in an elementary school.

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