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Jul 13

What About Your Friends?

by Tamar Caspi under Relationships

Remember that TLC song “What About Your Friends?”
What about your friends?
Will they stand their ground?
Will they let you down?
What about your friends?
Are they gonna be low down?
Will they ever be around?
Or will they turn their backs on you?

Epic words, right? But across the board, almost without fail, people tend to forget about their friends when they start a new relationship. It’s a nasty habit and singles ought to make a pledge not to forget about the people who were there for them before and will be there for them if and when this current relationship ends.

It’s always the same tune, different song: When you’re single and looking to surround yourself with your single friends. Then once you start dating someone and it gets serious you instantly drop all your friends and being completely immersed in the new relationship. Your single friends are put by the wayside and only once your relationship reaches the level of double-dating, do you commence communicating — with your coupled-up friends. Your single friends only resurface after you either have “The Talk” or break-up. That is, if they stick around long enough.

I think it’s natural to want to hang out with other couples when you become one of them, but it’s sad when you lose sight of your devoted friends during a new phase in your life. I understand why it happens: When you’re on the inside of something new you want to spend all of your free time together and when you can’t be together you’re on the phone talking or texting or emailing because it’s new and exciting and you’re getting to know each other better and falling in love. And even if you do pay some attention to your friends your mind wanders back to your new relationship and you don’t focus well on listening to what they have to say. Or all you do is talk about your new relationship until your friends lose their minds. And the worst part is you’re so self-involved you don’t even realize what you’re doing.

When we’re the single friends being left out to dry we hate it, yet we do the same thing when it’s our turn. So let’s all make a promise not to forget about our friends (or bore them to death with every last detail of our new relationship) when we become somebody’s boyfriend or girlfriend. You will need and want your friends one day – whether this relationship makes it or not – so show them how much you appreciate them by not ditching them the minute you (possibly) find love.

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