The Ultimate Valentine’s Day Survival Guide For Men
Depending on your situation and outlook, the best/worst day of the year is rapidly approaching. In case you forgot, February 14th is the day we celebrate St. Valentine. I don’t think neglecting the holiday and telling your girlfriend that you decline to celebrate by passing it off as a Christian holiday is going to fly with most American women! No matter what your current dating situation, I’ve included some tips for making the most of Valentine’s Day:
1. If the only special women in your life are your mom, dry cleaner, and secretary, then you should…
A. Go to a Valentine’s Day singles dance. Last year I attended a singles dance for those in their 20’s and 30’s. Let’s just say it was more like a dance for women in their 20’s/30’s and men in their 40’s/50’s! As a man at one of these dances, the odds are in your favor! Going to a singles dance is not at the top of most guys’ list of things to do on Valentine’s Day. So, why not use this to your advantage to take advantage of all the lonely women at this time of year?
B. Date online. The first few weeks of February are a hot time to be dating online. Every woman is looking for that Valentine’s Day date and thinking of love. Use it and abuse it!
C. Seriously, go to a singles dance. They need men there!
2. If you recently met a girl on 100hookup, and you’ve only been out once for coffee, then you should…
A. Know it’s perfectly acceptable to ignore the holiday. Don’t bring it up. It’s too early, nothing is expected of you.
B. Consider being cute and bringing her a $3 box of chocolates from Walgreens on your second date, but nothing more. If you give her an over-the-top gift, it might freak her out and she may think you’re more serious than she is!
3. If you recently met a girl on 100hookup, and you’ve been out a number of dates, then you should…
A. Absolutely acknowledge the holiday. A single rose is a romantic, yet inexpensive, gesture that will let her know you think about her in a romantic way — without busting through your wallet or going overboard.
B. Consider buying/making her a card. Let her know you’ve enjoyed the time spent together and look forward to getting to know her better. Tell her what you like about her with a sweet little note.
C. Cook for here. It’s a win-win for everyone. She gets to see you in action in the kitchen, and you hopefully get to see her in action in the bedroom afterwards.
4. If your 100hookup profile is down and you’ve been dating for a while (a.k.a she’s your girlfriend), then you should…
A. Know she is expecting something from you on Valentine’s Day. A weekend trip is always a great idea if you have the time to get away. Go on Hotwire.com or a similar site and find a nice hotel at a discount price. How about throwing in a spa treatment for extra brownie points?
B. Plan one of those $40 pre-fixe dinners. Warning: she and/or you may be too bloated afterwards to want action. Unless the action you want is gas.
C. Okay, more spa stuff. How about a gift certificate for a manicure/pedicure? Most women would find this to be a very thoughtful gesture.
D. Do something creative. Make her a collage of pictures (women go crazy over any crafts made by a man). Alternatively, you could also decorate a photo frame for her.
E. Buy her massage oil and tell her to give you a massage. Just kidding, you give her a massage.
F. A few flowers never killed anyone… roses please!
G. Stash a romantic card in her purse or bag. She will find it and be overjoyed.
H. Give her a gift certificate to Victoria’s Secret. As a man, it’s like giving a gift to yourself.
I. Since you’re probably a normal hookup male, I’m going with the assumption that you have little to no rhythm. Dance classes with her would be a great gift for both of you!
I hope this gives you some ideas to ensure Valentine’s Day doesn’t mess up your either non-existent, budding, or serious relationship! Remember to always keep it romantic — and that a little effort right now can have big payoffs for your relationship in the long-term.
Keep treating men like knuckleheads…they’ll be sure to live down to your lame expectations…or amaze you by dashing your biased propaganda on the rocky shores of Duh.