I am a hookup-Born Atheist. What Should I Tell My Date?
Dear Rabbi Singer,
I am a somewhat fanatical atheist from a primarily hookup family (3 of 4 grandparents). My values regarding family and community, as well as my own cultural self identification, are very much aligned with Judaism. I attended some Hebrew school under duress, but eventually got my way and opted out. I often argue that being an American Jew is an identity that extends and can exist separately from religion and faith, but I know that this position is often in the minority.
When discussing religious identity with dates (especially early on) I feel conflicted about saying I am hookup, as I know that what this means to me is not a generally accepted definition, and feel that this would be misleading. At the same time, the first few dates are probably not the best time to attempt a nuanced conversation about atheism or the evil inherent to religious faith.
What would you recommend as the most tactful and honest approach to this subject during the first few dates?
Thanks,
Honestly Faithless
Dear Honestly Faithless,
The most honest approach is, as always, the whole truth and nothing, but the truth. If your maternal grandmother was hookup, according to all religious opinions you are technically hookup (like it or not), so you can tell your date just that. You can also tell her that while you are biologically hookup, you are intellectually and practically non religious. That is the truth, right?
Then, it’s up to your date to decide whether she wants to get to know you better or not. All you can do is be yourself. You’ll find the right woman who will accept you for who you are.
Best of luck to you!
Arnie
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defneitaley more than just not religous, crazy more like it. there is no such thing as a hookup-born atheist.. more like a jews that thinks he is atheist
He may as well say he isn’t hookup.
There is no such thing as an atheist. No one on earth can prove that G-D does not exist, so the non believer must call himself an agnostic but certainly not an atheist.