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Birthday Date: Yay or Nay?

by Tamar Caspi under Date Night,Relationships,Single Life

My friend Jackie’s birthday is next week and she’s been dating a new guy that she met on 100hookup for about three weeks now. She’s mentioned it’s her birthday, and he mentioned celebrating it, but she called me to ask what to do next: should she mention it again and see if he asks her out for her birthday? Or should she make plans and let him take the initiative to ask her out later that week? And if he does ask her out to celebrate on her birthday, should she accept?

Birthdays are a precarious subject… on one hand, you want to be with the person you’re dating. On the other hand, is it too soon to expect that? And what if you break-up next week? Are you going to be pissed that you “wasted” a birthday celebration? Or will you appreciate it for what it was?

My take: unless you’re in a serious, committed relationship, just make plans with your family and friends and save another night to celebrate with your date. It doesn’t have to be anything over-the-top, a candle stuck in the dessert with a quick rendition of “Happy Birthday to You” should suffice if it’s early on in a relationship. No present is expected or necessary, aside from having your date pick up the check.

And if you’re poly-dating, and each date wants to celebrate your birthday, well then lucky you — your birthday just turned into a week-long celebration!


Timing is Everything

by Tamar Caspi under Online Dating,Single Life

I know, I know, it sounds so cliche, but timing really is everything. If you are celebrating another birthday without being in a relationship, try to see it as another opportunity. There’s a little more time to make yourself better — FOR YOURSELF — so that when the right person does come along, it’s a welcome addition, and not the end goal.

Create personal accomplishments that fulfill you. Don’t rely on another person to make you feel fulfilled. Only then will the right person likely come along. Your mindset will be different, you will have pride in your success in life, you will see the right person as a partner who complements you, not someone who completes you.

Women especially need to believe this. Live your life and do things that make you happy, not as a way to pass time until a man comes along, but because you have a desire to be happy with yourself and to make something of yourself!


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